“How’s business?” It’s a question I love to ask at networking events. Yet too often, the answer I receive is “Great thanks,” or “Not too bad.” Really? Is your business growing nicely, or are you struggling a bit? If you’re finding times a bit tough, I would rather know about it. I would much rather have an honest conversation with a potential supplier about what’s going on for them, than be lied to. I don’t want to agree to work with a new supplier who tells me that life is very rosy, only to find out a month later that they don’t actually have the staff or the capacity to provide me with the service I’m expecting.

Too frequently businesses don’t tell it like it is. Are you afraid of looking bad? Do you worry about answering that question with “Well, actually, we’re finding it a bit tricky right now”? If you’re too honest, will your prospects walk?

Being real is a really strong value for me. Yes, in the very early days of Appletree (and we’re talking over two decades ago!) I did use the ‘fake it until you make it’ approach from time to time. Smile and grit your teeth as you walk into a networking event. Be positive. Don’t let on that you’re a Marketing Consultant who is struggling to market her business and find new clients! However, I only used that approach until my business was strong enough and I could answer the question honestly.

From then on, I’ve told it like it is. If someone asks me how I’m doing and I’m not doing that well, I’ll tell them. I won’t give them full chapter and verse, but I will probably talk to them about a challenge I think they might be able to help me with. Or, I’ll tell them about the sort of support I need, in the hope that they know someone who can help me.

Talking Straight Talking

Does being real put people off from working with you? Yes, it does and that’s a good thing! If you’re not honest about the sort of work you love doing, or the type of clients you really love working with, you’ll end up taking on the wrong work and the wrong clients. The money might be useful, but when you work for non-ideal clients – the ones who beat you down on price and then want the work done really quickly too – you can’t do your best work. And those clients will just recommend you to other clients who think they can beat you down on price and then insist that the work is done really quickly …

Over the last 21 years I’ve developed a reputation for being a bit straight talking. Well, OK, a lot straight talking! Some people call me bossy, or organised – it’s the same thing. I warn my potential clients, before they decide to work with me, that I’m like that. “If I see you about to make a major mistake in your marketing, I’ll tell you not to do it; and then I’ll give you an alternative that won’t cost as much and that will get you better results.” That’s what I tell them. The majority of replies? “Great – that’s exactly the support I want,” and they sign on the dotted line!

The Onstage Mask

I work with a lot of professional speakers, as well and coaches and consultants. The really good speakers are really real when they’re on stage. They might be introverts, which actually makes them quite shy when they’re speaking to large audiences, and they own their introversion. Introverts on stage are great at connecting with introverts in their audience. Or, they might be extroverts and love jumping about on stage, inspiring the people they speak to. Wherever they are on the line, between introvert and extrovert, the really good ones are totally honest, allowing the real person to shine through. Introverts who try to be extroverts on stage stick out like sore thumbs to those of us who are more extroverted. Speakers who try to pass off someone else’s material as their own, or who are pretending to be someone they’re not, will see audience members get up and walk out.

I’m not saying that if you’re nervous, you should tell the audience how scared you are. You need to learn to harness your nerves and turn them to your advantage. Do your preparation – lots and lots of it – and develop your own powerful material and stories. Your strength will come from your stories and you’ll be able to truly connect with your audience, whether you’re being paid to speak or you’re speaking to promote your business.

Writing it Up

“We’re the number one company for what you need!” “Probably the best in the world!”

Really? How honest is your marketing? If you’ve been doing what you do for over 21 years, tell the people who read your newsletter. But, if you’ve been doing it for less than a year, don’t tell people that you’re an ‘expert’ in your field!

Stop trying so hard to impress potential clients. Don’t show off. Be the real you and you’ll attract to you the people you really want to work with, who really want to work with the real you.